I AM NOW TAKING NOMINATIONS FOR THE 7TH ANNUAL DUMBEST COMMERCIAL OF THE YEAR CONTEST!!!

For those of you who remember this contest from last year, I know I'm running a little late with it. My apologies, but it is here now.  I started this contest with a few friends in 8th grade and it has steadily expanded. I'm running it on Xanga for the second year in a row. This is your chance to vent and complain about the commercials from this year that you never want to see again. For those of you who are new this time around (or for those who need a friendly reminder), here are the rules:

1. The commercial had to have aired sometime in 2003 (preferably for the first time, but I'm willing to make exceptions).

2. No movie ads (we know they're stupid; don't reinforce it), although commercials that spoof movie ads are welcome.

3. No video ads (unless it's one of those you have to order over the phone or something like that).

4. Submit local commercials at your own risk. If I don't know what you're talking about, I won't list it. I know this rule automatically disqualifies international commercials. I'm sorry about that, but I'm only a poor American college student who doesn't have access to TV from other countries. Perhaps you guys could start up your own...

5. Please, do not submit anything obscene or pornographic.

Past winners (or losers, depending on your POV) are:

1997: Big Lots (If you don't remember "Closeout Man," be glad you don't. If you do, my condolences)

1998: Affordable Chiropractic (This was a local commercial, but the contest was still local then. Basically, it featured a bunch of REALLY bad actors doing whatever-such as riding motorcycles in a field or playing basketball-and one complains about his/her bad back, and another recommends this Affordable Chiropractic. Then the camera would pan over to a guy with a guitar singing a really bad jingle off-key:"I'm pain-free, it's as easy as 1,2,3..." Luckily, this place is now out of business so I don't have to put up with it anymore.)

1999: Home Depot (Santa Claus crashes into the chimney. C'mon people...)

2000: D-Con (This is probably the most disturbing one so far. We are shown a bunch of warm, fuzzy shots of Christmas trees, stockings, cookies, etc, while the announcer reads the first few lines of "The Night Before Christmas." After all these warm, fuzzy shots, the announcer says the line "Not a creature was stirring, not even a...mouse." The word "mouse" is said in a really evil tone, and at the same point, we are offered a shot of the D-Con box. How tasteless can you get?)

2001: Dell ("Dude, you were really annoying." Not that the ad campaign that replaced him is any better)

2002: 1-800-CALL-ATT (Why they ever thought Carrot Top would be entertaining is a mystery that may never be solved. The good news is that I think they've gotten rid of him, but I could be wrong).

Please spread the word as well. I'll take nominations until Dec. 29, so hurry!!!

Chris temporarily hijacked my site, but I'm back now...

If I'm correct, the Golden Globe nominations are announced tomorrow, so I'll probably have something to say about that when I next post, which may be either tomorrow or Friday. I'm going home tomorrow, so that's why I'm not sure.

I decided to take the same presidential candidate quiz that Chris took, and here's my results, along with my responses:

1. TAXES & SPENDING (Check any and all statements with which you agree)
Reduce federal spending and taxes, even if this means shifting responsibility for providing services to state and local government, private industry, charitable groups and/or individuals.
Increase federal spending and taxes--if needed to provide services and protection to the Americans.
Regardless of increases or decreases, it is vitally important that federal spending and taxes are balanced.
There should be a guaranteed livable annual income for all, including those outside the work force.
Full employment for all Americans should be federal policy.
Eliminate federal estate taxes.

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

2. Federally funded social services and poverty aid should be delivered through religious, community-based, or other non-profit organizations. These Bush administration developed legislative proposals are commonly referred to as the "faith-based initiative."
Agree
Disagree
None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions/Not sure

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

3. Federal funding of welfare and assistance to unemployed and under-employed individuals and families:
Should be increased
Should be decreased
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

4. Federal funding of "corporate welfare", which has been defined as "special government subsidies or benefits that are targeted to specific industries or businesses":
Should be increased
Should be decreased
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

5. SECURITY & TERRORISM Since 9-11 the issues of civil rights and liberties have come into conflict with issues of security. (Check any and all statements with which you agree)
Law enforcement agencies should be granted greater discretion to read mail and email, tap phones, and conduct random searches.
America should adopt stricter standards for international student visas.
Terrorist suspects should be tried in civilian courts with due process protections (rather than in military tribunals).

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

6. FOREIGN AFFAIRS (Check any and all statements with which you agree)
It is appropriate for the US to take unilateral military action against enemy nations--for example Iraq.
It is appropriate for the US to support the formation of a Palestinian state.
It is appropriate for the US to maintain a non-interventionist foreign policy.
It is bad policy for the US to attack an enemy nation pre-emptively.

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

7. EDUCATION (Check any and all statements with which you agree)
Allow parents to use vouchers (equal opportunity scholarships) to send their children to any participating school: public, private or religious.
Increase federal funding of public schools.
Tie federal education funding to local public school performance.
Support tax incentives and/or increased federal funding of programs such as grants and loans to help students attend college.

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

8. HEALTH CARE (Check any and all statements with which you agree)
Support the concept of federally funded national healthcare coverage for all or most Americans.
Prohibit cloning of human embryos.

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

9. SOCIAL SECURITY (Check any and all statements with which you agree)
Allow workers to invest a portion of their payroll tax into private investments.
Support measures to protect Social Security and Medicare (but excluding privatization).

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

10. ILLICIT DRUG LAWS Laws and penalties regarding illegal drugs such as a narcotics, hallucinogens, etc.
Should be reduced or eliminated.
Should be enforced at current levels.
Should be increased.
Prevent and reduce drug use through education and counseling, but do not legalize drugs.
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

11. TRADE: On issues of trade with other countries, my ideal candidate would favor the following:
Less restrictive "Free Trade" policies.
More restrictive "Fair Trade" policies.
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

12. GUN POLICY Regarding the following special interest groups, my ideal candidate will generally support the positions of:
The National Rifle Association,
The Coalition to Stop Gun Violence,
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

13. ABORTION POLICY Regarding the following special interest groups, my ideal candidate will generally support the positions of:
Planned Parenthood,
National Right to Life Committee,
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

14. ENVIRONMENTAL POLICY Regarding the positions of the League of Conservation Voters, my ideal candidate will generally:
Share the positions of the League of Conservation Voters
Oppose the positions of the League of Conservation Voters
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

15. MINORITY ISSUES Regarding the positions of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People, my ideal candidate will generally:
Share the positions of the NAACP
Oppose the positions the NAACP
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

16. CIVIL LIBERTIES Regarding the positions of the American Civil Liberties Union, my ideal candidate will generally:
Share the positions of the ACLU
Oppose the positions of the ACLU
No preference/None of the above/Prefer alternate solutions

What priority do you place on your selection above? High    Medium    Low

17. CANDIDATE VIABILITY-- Remove from scoring consideration those candidates on my list:
who have withdrawn from the race for President.
who have not yet announced their intention to run for President
who are not affiliated with one of the two major political parties.

 

 

Your Results:

1.	Your ideal theoretical candidate.   (100%)  Click here for info
2.	Clark, Retired General Wesley K., AR - Democrat   (97%)  Click here for info
3.	Gephardt, Rep. Dick, MO - Democrat   (96%)  Click here for info
4.	Edwards, Senator John, NC - Democrat   (82%)  Click here for info
5.	Dean, Gov. Howard, VT - Democrat   (78%)  Click here for info
6.	Kerry, Senator John, MA - Democrat   (73%)  Click here for info
7.	Kucinich, Rep. Dennis, OH - Democrat   (69%)  Click here for info
8.	Sharpton, Reverend Al - Democrat   (37%)  Click here for info
9.	Moseley-Braun, Former Senator Carol, IL - Democrat   (27%)  Click here for info
10.	Libertarian Candidate   (24%)  Click here for info
11.	LaRouche, Lyndon H. Jr. - Democrat   (20%)  Click here for info
12.	Lieberman, Senator Joe, CT - Democrat   (17%)  Click here for info
13.	Bush, President George W. - Republican   (16%)  Click here for info
14.	Phillips, Howard - Constitution   (7%)  Click here for info

 

 

WEBSITE OF THE WEEK

 

 

 

Pirates Site

 

I thought I’d put this up in honor of Pirates of the Caribbean being out on DVD (and yes, I have received mine, but, oddly enough, I haven’t watched it yet). As the title suggests, this is a site devoted to pirates and piracy. It’s pretty thorough, with a section on the history of piracy, biographies of famous pirates, and a large section of random pirate facts, including codes of conduct, a guide to pirate ships, and a small article on modern piracy (which surprised me, although it probably should not have).

 

Previous Websites of the Week:

 

The Deadly Follies of Stick Figure Warning Man and Family

Jennifer Government: Nation States

Cannot Find Weapons of Mass Destruction

Secret Service Test

The Brick Testament

Hero Machine

Urban Legends Reference Pages

The Shadow Radio Theater

The Shadowlands: Ghosts and Hauntings

Story Generator

I Used To Believe

Time Travel

Doom Buggies

 

 

 

Please welcome my newest subscriber, the_collector.

 

Well, classes are over for the semester (and technically, my junior year is over, since I’m a semester ahead of everyone, although I won’t graduate early or anything). The most significant thing is that I have now completed my Chemistry minor, and I never have to take another Chemistry course again (I know you get into it in med school, but at least there it’s under the guise of medicine). Chris is visiting next week, and I’m going home next Thursday.

 

Fencing went pretty well on Tuesday. We started épée, and it wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be, although I didn’t take to it as fast as I did sabre. I think I like sabre and foil better than épée, but I can’t choose between sabre and foil. Also, it looks as if I’m going to be Fencing Club captain starting next semester.

 

I am currently on an Inuyasha spree. I’m usually not much of an anime enthusiast, although if Liz wants to show me something I’ll let her. I don’t dislike anime, mind you, but the only two anime shows that I love and watch faithfully are Ranma ½ and Inuyasha (and I definitely like Inuyasha better than Ranma)., and of course I loved Spirited Away. For some reason, my mom has decided that since I like two anime shows, I must like all anime. She drives me crazy when she does that. At the beginning of the school year, she tried to buy me Yu-Gi-Oh folders. When I refused, she replied, “But it’s anime.” As far as entertainment goes, I tend to go for plot first, format second. If a show with a story I like happens to be an animated series from Japan, so be it. But I digress. As I said, I am currently on an Inuyasha spree. It started as a result of my History of Cinema class. I got so sick of all the other students talking about their workshop projects, and who was filming/editing/lighting what, that I was starting to go crazy from not using Final Cut Pro in a year. I got to the point where I HAD to edit something, so I decided to make a music video. The only two shows that I had enough footage of were Monster House and Inuyasha. Monster House isn’t quite music video material (it’s a building/decorating show), so I grabbed my Inuyasha tapes and headed for the Digital Media Lab. I ended up making a pretty good music video, if I do say so myself, even though there’s a continuous Adult Swim logo in the corner. Anyways, editing all this stuff made me want to watch it, which I did. Last night Liz and I watched the second Inuyasha movie, which was pretty good, even though we had to watch it in Japanese with subtitles (it hasn’t been released in the United States yet). I only watch the show in English, so the Japanese voices sounded kind of weird, although most of them weren’t bad (but I still prefer Inuyasha’s English voice to his Japanese voice). The animation was “movie-quality,” so everyone looked slightly different (and I think I like the way they look on the show better, but I’m not going to be picky about it). Much to Liz’s surprise, the plot was based around a Japanese myth (The Bamboo Cutter’s Tale, or The Bamboo Princess, as it’s sometimes called) that she happens to be doing print illustrations of for her senior project. She was so excited when she realized it. She showed me the prints that she has done, and they’re really good. I just realized that this paragraph is probably longer than it needs to be, so I’ll shut up about it now.

 

The only bit of sci-fi news I have is that apparently production is set to begin this month on a Farscape mini-series. Yay! Finally, they have a chance for redemption. For those who don't know, the series had possibly one of the worst endings ever. Earth was saved, but in the epilogue segment, Crichton and Aeryn were sharing a moment when some spaceship came out of nowhere and blasted them into powder. I was so pissed off when I found out. And yes, Ben Browder and Claudia Black are set to star in the mini-series, so it has to have Crichton and Aeryn in it somehow. 

 

In other movie news, I found a poster for the live-action/computer animated Garfield movie that comes out next summer:  

 

Needless to say, things don't look very promising. I'm sorry, but Garfield just looks weird...

 

Okay, both my peppermint tea and my lemon tea boxes are missing. I swear to God I had them when I came back from Thanksgiving, and that I kept them in a large plastic bag, and now they're not there. Now I have to drink Apple Cinnamon Spice tea until break (and it's impossible to get it right; it always ends up being too spicy or too weak). Damn.

 

Well, I’ll leave you with something weird I overheard on campus (and I have no idea who said it): “When you’re playing rugby or something, you’re running into a person. When you’re playing squash, you’re running full speed into a wall.”

I know I haven't been really attentive to this site recently. I promise I'll do better, but I won't be on for at least a couple more days. I'm working on a HUGE download and it's sucking up all the bandwidth I have. That seems like a lame excuse, but if you've ever experienced Denison's internet connection, you'll know it's a valid one. See ya in a couple days!